I emailed B's homeopath a few days ago, since she wanted to hear from us about two weeks after I gave him the remedy. His eczema had cleared up some, but it came back, so she had me give him another dose and also suggested that I go off dairy again, this time for six weeks. Tim's high school reunion is in 4 weeks, so that weekend should be pretty interesting as far as meals go. I went through pretty severe withdrawals the first couple of days, but seem to be feeling a little better now. I'm a little nervous about getting all my calories, though, since dairy was a huge part of my diet. A lot of what I ate either was dairy itself or it had dairy in it. I picked up some almond milk and some soy ice cream. So far the almond milk seems fine (not sure if I like the unsweetened one or not, I may try coconut milk next time) but the soy ice cream made me feel a little nauseous afterward. I'm not holding out a ton of hope on dairy being his trigger since I did try it previously. He is showing some improvement, but that could just be the next dose of remedy doing its work, and not the dairy at all.
Not a whole lot else going on. I am finding it hard to keep on top of my chores, especially laundry. I keep saying that I will fold the clothes after "just one more load." But then while that load is washing and drying and being put away, another dirty load seems to just appear out of nowhere. Part of my problem is that I am still doing some transcription and have tried to do a little extra to help with B's medical bills from his recent tests, and for his visit to the homeopath. Plus, we need to gather together a few funds so that we have a small lump some so we can possibly go shopping for a large item next spring.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Thursday, May 27, 2010
growing and playing
Benjamin is gaining weight appropriately. His doctor did end up sending him for some blood tests (slightly elevated liver enzymes) and a liver ultrasound (normal). The on-site lactation consultant also asked me if I was getting enough calories. I was not, and after a week of counting my calories, he gained nearly 6 ounces. He is still gaining and today is right at 15 pounds. I'll be going in for roughly biweekly weight checks until his 9-month appointment later this summer.
I am still practicing elimination communication with him, and it is going well. I still can't tell at all when he needs to go, so I've just been doing it on timing. We went through a couple of phases where our communication seemed to be off, so I took brief breaks here and there. But so far, this week has been pretty good. I've even had my first #2 catch(es) since he was an infant. I'm so glad I kept doing it and didn't just give up altogether.
His eczema, on the other hand, not so great. It's still just as bad as it's always been. And just when I think I've found out which food it was that was causing it, his face gets worse, even before I re-introduce the potentially offending food. We did go ahead and go see a homeopath on the 19th, and she sent us home w/ a remedy that I will give him on Monday, then give it several weeks to see what affect it'll have. Meanwhile, a friend gave us a referral to a pediatric allergist so I may make an appointment to get a blood test for him, just to see if he is allergic to something that I can control.
And now if you made it this far, here are a couple of videos for your enjoyment.
Lydia decided to dress Benjamin up in her princess outfit. He liked it.
Here she is, teaching him a Bible class song until she saw me filming her, lol.
And you know how those sauce packets from a particular fast-food Mexican restaurant have cute and corny sayings on them? Here she is, "reading" them.
I am still practicing elimination communication with him, and it is going well. I still can't tell at all when he needs to go, so I've just been doing it on timing. We went through a couple of phases where our communication seemed to be off, so I took brief breaks here and there. But so far, this week has been pretty good. I've even had my first #2 catch(es) since he was an infant. I'm so glad I kept doing it and didn't just give up altogether.
His eczema, on the other hand, not so great. It's still just as bad as it's always been. And just when I think I've found out which food it was that was causing it, his face gets worse, even before I re-introduce the potentially offending food. We did go ahead and go see a homeopath on the 19th, and she sent us home w/ a remedy that I will give him on Monday, then give it several weeks to see what affect it'll have. Meanwhile, a friend gave us a referral to a pediatric allergist so I may make an appointment to get a blood test for him, just to see if he is allergic to something that I can control.
And now if you made it this far, here are a couple of videos for your enjoyment.
Lydia decided to dress Benjamin up in her princess outfit. He liked it.
Here she is, teaching him a Bible class song until she saw me filming her, lol.
And you know how those sauce packets from a particular fast-food Mexican restaurant have cute and corny sayings on them? Here she is, "reading" them.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
trying to heal my baby
Hm. My "dashboard" on here says that I made a post on March 31, but I can't find it now, so I guess I'll just start from here and give an update.
Lydia is doing so great with her potty training. She's even dry most nights now, too, but does still have the occasional accident. She takes herself to the potty and wipes and everything (but of course still needs help w/ #2s). It'll be interesting to see how she does on a 6.5-hour road trip next week.
Tim's job is going awesome. He had enough sales to "qualify" his own route and finally got his raise. :D He is really doing awesome and totally loves his work.
My work is also going fine. I'm still transcribing and also still making play food every now and then. I had two orders this month, one from someone I did know, and one from a total stranger. I'm still in the middle of the order from the stranger, but between that and transcribing and the children and everything else, I am definitely keeping busy.
B had his 6-month appointment a couple of weeks ago, and he only gained two ounces since his 4-month appointment. I am not concerned about my supply and have sort of been suspicious of reflux all along, so he is now on some reflux medication, and has been for just over a week. It seems to be helping. I also took him to a chiropractor on Thursday, who looked at his head and noticed it was slightly crooked, so she loosened his skull so that he could grow into it evenly. She also showed me a massage for his belly to help pull his stomach down into his abdomen instead of letting it be stuck up under his ribs. I don't know if I'm doing it right, though, b/c I can't find the "gap" that is supposed to be there when his stomach is in the proper spot.
She gave me some probiotics to start taking, and also recommended that I go see a homeopath. She noticed his eczema and so we talked a lot about that, and she thinks that it is food-related, but she also thinks that the homeopath can help me with that. So I am going to call her next week and hopefully be able to see her shortly after I return to town.
Benjamin really is a happy baby overall, though. He can finally roll both ways, though like his sister, he did it from back to front first. He can babble the "B" sound. He is smiley and talkative and usually in a good mood (which is part of what makes me doubt that he has reflux, but he did have several other symptoms, like refusal to eat and sour-smelling spit-up). I just want him to be as healthy as he can be. I have been praying to God to heal his eczema and/or show me how to help Benjamin heal, and right now, I think that a visit to the homeopath is the answer that He is giving us right now. She is also a nutritionist so she might have some words to share with me in that regard as well. I know that I did say in an earlier post that the saga was ending, but the comments that people keep saying to me are painful (even when they say "oh it looks like his skin is clearing up." Because yeah, maybe it's clearing up right at that moment... but maybe an hour later it'll be flared up again). He needs more help than I can give him by myself right now.
Lydia is doing so great with her potty training. She's even dry most nights now, too, but does still have the occasional accident. She takes herself to the potty and wipes and everything (but of course still needs help w/ #2s). It'll be interesting to see how she does on a 6.5-hour road trip next week.
Tim's job is going awesome. He had enough sales to "qualify" his own route and finally got his raise. :D He is really doing awesome and totally loves his work.
My work is also going fine. I'm still transcribing and also still making play food every now and then. I had two orders this month, one from someone I did know, and one from a total stranger. I'm still in the middle of the order from the stranger, but between that and transcribing and the children and everything else, I am definitely keeping busy.
B had his 6-month appointment a couple of weeks ago, and he only gained two ounces since his 4-month appointment. I am not concerned about my supply and have sort of been suspicious of reflux all along, so he is now on some reflux medication, and has been for just over a week. It seems to be helping. I also took him to a chiropractor on Thursday, who looked at his head and noticed it was slightly crooked, so she loosened his skull so that he could grow into it evenly. She also showed me a massage for his belly to help pull his stomach down into his abdomen instead of letting it be stuck up under his ribs. I don't know if I'm doing it right, though, b/c I can't find the "gap" that is supposed to be there when his stomach is in the proper spot.
She gave me some probiotics to start taking, and also recommended that I go see a homeopath. She noticed his eczema and so we talked a lot about that, and she thinks that it is food-related, but she also thinks that the homeopath can help me with that. So I am going to call her next week and hopefully be able to see her shortly after I return to town.
Benjamin really is a happy baby overall, though. He can finally roll both ways, though like his sister, he did it from back to front first. He can babble the "B" sound. He is smiley and talkative and usually in a good mood (which is part of what makes me doubt that he has reflux, but he did have several other symptoms, like refusal to eat and sour-smelling spit-up). I just want him to be as healthy as he can be. I have been praying to God to heal his eczema and/or show me how to help Benjamin heal, and right now, I think that a visit to the homeopath is the answer that He is giving us right now. She is also a nutritionist so she might have some words to share with me in that regard as well. I know that I did say in an earlier post that the saga was ending, but the comments that people keep saying to me are painful (even when they say "oh it looks like his skin is clearing up." Because yeah, maybe it's clearing up right at that moment... but maybe an hour later it'll be flared up again). He needs more help than I can give him by myself right now.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
the next big thing
My three big waits are over. Baby has arrived, hubby has a job, and Lydia is potty trained. I don't know what the "next big thing" is now. Just, life. Day-to-day stuff. Chores. There's nothing huge to wait for anymore. I am content.
For Lydia's potty training, I changed my approach at the end. I gave her tiny presents to unwrap if she did #2 in the potty. If she did #2 in her pants, I cleaned her up w/o any words at all (previously, I am embarrassed to say that I would sometimes lose it and yell in frustration). A few days of this, and she decided that #2s went in the potty. Then, one evening, she went to the potty all by herself, w/o me reminding her. And that was that. She's had a couple of accidents since then, but she is daytime trained, for naps and everything. Night-training could happen in a week or it could happen in a year or more. I'm not stressed about that at all.
Benjamin's "potty training" is going well, too. We have our phases that we go through were sometimes we're in tune with each other and other times we're not, but the past few days have been pretty good. It's a little easier overall now that he's bigger, and can sit by himself on the little potty w/ me helping him a little.
Tim's job is still going fine. There is someone up there who is leaving, and starting yesterday, that person took Tim out on his route so that he could introduce Tim to his customers... as his replacement. :) Yes, after over four months of "training," Tim is finally getting his own route. We are pretty excited about this.
My work is going fine, too. I'm still transcribing for two companies and love the flexible schedule. I also make play food and a few other crocheted items every now and then, when people want it, but it's not my "main thing" like I'd hoped it would be when I first started it.
I've gone through a partial purge here, w/ some clothes and toys and stuff. The half of the living room that doubles as Lydia's play area had previously been massively cluttered w/ random books and toys there. Nothing had a place of its own. I think that the purge has affected Lydia's attitude, for the better. She just seems "easier" seemingly overnight. It's hard to put the change into words, but it's there, definitely.
We had Benjamin's 4-month visit yesterday and he is 13 lbs 12 oz and 26" long and his head is 17" around. I did ask his doctor about his facial issues, and she thought it might be eczema. She said that, if I wanted, I could put straight Vaseline on it and also occasional hydrocortisone, but that she wouldn't do any more than that at this time. I also told her that I cut dairy out of my diet, and she said that I could continue that as well. The first time I cut it out, after about 11-12 days, he started to get better. Then I ate some cheese and sour cream, and he got worse again within hours. I'm now on day 10 of stopping dairy again and am seeing a very slight improvement.
Now I'm at the end of this post. I guess the next big thing will be home ownership, but that's too far away to even have a countdown for yet. Soon, though... soon. :)
For Lydia's potty training, I changed my approach at the end. I gave her tiny presents to unwrap if she did #2 in the potty. If she did #2 in her pants, I cleaned her up w/o any words at all (previously, I am embarrassed to say that I would sometimes lose it and yell in frustration). A few days of this, and she decided that #2s went in the potty. Then, one evening, she went to the potty all by herself, w/o me reminding her. And that was that. She's had a couple of accidents since then, but she is daytime trained, for naps and everything. Night-training could happen in a week or it could happen in a year or more. I'm not stressed about that at all.
Benjamin's "potty training" is going well, too. We have our phases that we go through were sometimes we're in tune with each other and other times we're not, but the past few days have been pretty good. It's a little easier overall now that he's bigger, and can sit by himself on the little potty w/ me helping him a little.
Tim's job is still going fine. There is someone up there who is leaving, and starting yesterday, that person took Tim out on his route so that he could introduce Tim to his customers... as his replacement. :) Yes, after over four months of "training," Tim is finally getting his own route. We are pretty excited about this.
My work is going fine, too. I'm still transcribing for two companies and love the flexible schedule. I also make play food and a few other crocheted items every now and then, when people want it, but it's not my "main thing" like I'd hoped it would be when I first started it.
I've gone through a partial purge here, w/ some clothes and toys and stuff. The half of the living room that doubles as Lydia's play area had previously been massively cluttered w/ random books and toys there. Nothing had a place of its own. I think that the purge has affected Lydia's attitude, for the better. She just seems "easier" seemingly overnight. It's hard to put the change into words, but it's there, definitely.
We had Benjamin's 4-month visit yesterday and he is 13 lbs 12 oz and 26" long and his head is 17" around. I did ask his doctor about his facial issues, and she thought it might be eczema. She said that, if I wanted, I could put straight Vaseline on it and also occasional hydrocortisone, but that she wouldn't do any more than that at this time. I also told her that I cut dairy out of my diet, and she said that I could continue that as well. The first time I cut it out, after about 11-12 days, he started to get better. Then I ate some cheese and sour cream, and he got worse again within hours. I'm now on day 10 of stopping dairy again and am seeing a very slight improvement.
Now I'm at the end of this post. I guess the next big thing will be home ownership, but that's too far away to even have a countdown for yet. Soon, though... soon. :)
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
the newborn acne saga ends here
No new pictures today. He looks about the same. Just some thoughts, instead. I'm probably a little crazy, but anyway here they are.
So, my peers have babies who have beautiful skin. I don't know a single other in-real-life baby (younger than 6 months old) who has even a little bit of redness. So my baby is red. Maybe it'll go away. Maybe it's eczema. Maybe it's yeast. Maybe the cause will never be known and he'll stay red indefinitely.
And? I'm okay with that. This is MY baby that God saw fit to bless me with. Benjamin is a smiley, happy baby. He doesn't have colic. He is (usually) easy to sooth. He's growing. I wouldn't think that his disposition would be so happy if the rash were bothersome to him.
He's already three months old. Three months! I don't know where the time went. Yes I do. It disappeared while I kept dwelling on his appearance instead of who he is. I don't want to let any more unnecessary time escape, time that I could instead spend watching him grow.
Sure, I'll mention it at his next doctor visit. And maybe he'll outgrow it. Maybe he won't. I'm not going to keep my life on "pause" any more. He and I are getting pictures made on Friday, a gift from Mom. Back when she and I were talking about it, I had the brief thought that his skin would be better come picture time. But I can't hit the "pause" button for life. He will only be three months old once, and then it's gone.
I don't want to miss the important things.
So, my peers have babies who have beautiful skin. I don't know a single other in-real-life baby (younger than 6 months old) who has even a little bit of redness. So my baby is red. Maybe it'll go away. Maybe it's eczema. Maybe it's yeast. Maybe the cause will never be known and he'll stay red indefinitely.
And? I'm okay with that. This is MY baby that God saw fit to bless me with. Benjamin is a smiley, happy baby. He doesn't have colic. He is (usually) easy to sooth. He's growing. I wouldn't think that his disposition would be so happy if the rash were bothersome to him.
He's already three months old. Three months! I don't know where the time went. Yes I do. It disappeared while I kept dwelling on his appearance instead of who he is. I don't want to let any more unnecessary time escape, time that I could instead spend watching him grow.
Sure, I'll mention it at his next doctor visit. And maybe he'll outgrow it. Maybe he won't. I'm not going to keep my life on "pause" any more. He and I are getting pictures made on Friday, a gift from Mom. Back when she and I were talking about it, I had the brief thought that his skin would be better come picture time. But I can't hit the "pause" button for life. He will only be three months old once, and then it's gone.
I don't want to miss the important things.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
a new year with new challenges... and some old ones
One of my new challenges is to get in better shape. It's not really a "New Year's Resolution" per se, but since I just happen to be about 3 months postpartum and also still about 16 lbs over my pre-pregnancy weight (I haven't lost any additional weight since the first two weeks), it's time to be a little more proactive. Our apartment remodeled the old laundry room into a workout room. I have been there twice so far... once to check it out, and once to actually do a session. I just did the treadmill and will probably stick with that for the forseeable future, unless it's busy, and then I will probably do the stepper. I've never really thought my diet was TOO terrible, but when I keep thinking about exercising, it's also making me think twice about what I eat, too, like for snacks and whatnot. I need to get more fruits and veggies and fewer chips and cookies. Or maybe I can put the fruits and veggies IN the chips and cookies, lol, like make dried veggie chips and then put carrots and zucchini in the cookies.
An always-ongoing challenge is finances, of course. We are very very blessed to have received an answer to our prayers for a good job for hubby, but after nearly four months on the job, he still does not have his own route yet and therefore is still making "training" pay. He tells me that he is next in line to get one, though, so hopefully any day now we will have some changes. Meanwhile, the training pay comes just slightly short of our monthly needs, so I have been continuing to work as well. I have narrowed down all my transcription things to just two companies, and between the two of them, it's a nice supplement to hubby's job. January is also a month where his job gets three checks, so there's that "extra" money, too, which will help keep us afloat.
Benjamin is growing like a weed. I weighed him today and he is 13 lbs 13 oz. Lydia didn't reach that weight until nearly 10 months. He has a double chin and is very smiley and loves to "talk" to people. I've gotten to where I can get him up on my back for grocery store trips, and it's SO much comfier than wearing him on my front. I am trying to branch out to a few different ways to wrap him up there, but am having a few failures intermixed with my successes. But at least I CAN get him there. We are still ECing with him as well, and that is also still having its hits and misses. He still has skin issues on his face. His dr said at his 2 month appointment that it was just acne and sensitive skin, but I'm starting to wonder if it's eczema and if he's sensitive to something in my diet. I tried to keep a food log b/c the redness does come and go (although it's heavier on the "come" side than the "go" side), but I really eat the exact same thing every day so that didn't help me any.
Lydia has entered the terrible threes in full force. Whenever I'm consistent with her discipline, she is a dream child, but if I slack even in the very slightest, she sees that as an opportunity to whine, cry, run away when I call her, etc. It is hard to be consistent w/ Benjamin around, since often times he is nursing or needing a diaper or whatever at the same time that she needs attention, but with prayers and with the grace of God, I will continue to try to be a better mother each day than I was the day before. And tomorrow it will be easy to do that, because today, I did not have a good day, mostly related to her potty training, or lack thereof. I got upset at a situation in the evening, and told her how I really felt. :(
But let me elaborate on the potty training and then you might be able to at least understand my frustrations. Last week, I set up a posterboard in the bathroom. On it, there are pictures of pee and poop in the potty (ok pictures of potties and then I colored some brown and yellow... I wanted it to be real but not TOO real, lol), pictures of wet and dirty diapers being put into the pail, a picture of Lydia "telling" me and hubby that she needs to go potty, and a picture of a dry diaper. She was with me while I was making it, and I talked it up, but it still took a few days or so for her to understand what it was for. But she seemed to like it. Oh and at the very bottom was a picture of her "prize"... some Dora panties.
She is still not catching on that she needs to (eventually) initiate her own trips to the potty. But she does things that get my hopes up, and then does other things that just make me really feel like she WILL be wearing diapers to college. On Sunday, she stayed dry (in a Pull-up) ALL DAY, including a #2 in the afternoon. Granted, I was taking her more often than I would have gone myself (and I initiated all the trips), but still, ALL DAY... including eating out after church and being out late like that (she went early at the restaurant and then not again until we got home). But then today, it was diaper after diaper. She did have one instance where I was in the bathroom, and she was in there too, w/ a wet diaper, so I took the old diaper off while I was sitting down and she was standing next to me. Then while her diaper was off and I finished up my business, she sat down UNPROMPTED on her little potty and went #1. Then she thought about it and said she had to go #2, and a few minutes later, she did that as well... also in her potty. We celebrated and got stickers and I started to put a diaper back on her (trying to save the $$$ Pull-ups for church) but she wanted a Pull-up. I told her that she needed to go to the potty on her own and if she peed or pooped in it, then she'd be getting a diaper. Not even FIVE minutes later... she did #2... IN the Pull-up. Yay. Then this evening right before bed, another #2, in her diaper. :( And it was one that was really hard to clean up, too.
So that is where we are with that. I don't want to close on that unhappy note, so I'll share a couple of recent pictures of Benjamin, since it's been a while since I shared.
An always-ongoing challenge is finances, of course. We are very very blessed to have received an answer to our prayers for a good job for hubby, but after nearly four months on the job, he still does not have his own route yet and therefore is still making "training" pay. He tells me that he is next in line to get one, though, so hopefully any day now we will have some changes. Meanwhile, the training pay comes just slightly short of our monthly needs, so I have been continuing to work as well. I have narrowed down all my transcription things to just two companies, and between the two of them, it's a nice supplement to hubby's job. January is also a month where his job gets three checks, so there's that "extra" money, too, which will help keep us afloat.
Benjamin is growing like a weed. I weighed him today and he is 13 lbs 13 oz. Lydia didn't reach that weight until nearly 10 months. He has a double chin and is very smiley and loves to "talk" to people. I've gotten to where I can get him up on my back for grocery store trips, and it's SO much comfier than wearing him on my front. I am trying to branch out to a few different ways to wrap him up there, but am having a few failures intermixed with my successes. But at least I CAN get him there. We are still ECing with him as well, and that is also still having its hits and misses. He still has skin issues on his face. His dr said at his 2 month appointment that it was just acne and sensitive skin, but I'm starting to wonder if it's eczema and if he's sensitive to something in my diet. I tried to keep a food log b/c the redness does come and go (although it's heavier on the "come" side than the "go" side), but I really eat the exact same thing every day so that didn't help me any.
Lydia has entered the terrible threes in full force. Whenever I'm consistent with her discipline, she is a dream child, but if I slack even in the very slightest, she sees that as an opportunity to whine, cry, run away when I call her, etc. It is hard to be consistent w/ Benjamin around, since often times he is nursing or needing a diaper or whatever at the same time that she needs attention, but with prayers and with the grace of God, I will continue to try to be a better mother each day than I was the day before. And tomorrow it will be easy to do that, because today, I did not have a good day, mostly related to her potty training, or lack thereof. I got upset at a situation in the evening, and told her how I really felt. :(
But let me elaborate on the potty training and then you might be able to at least understand my frustrations. Last week, I set up a posterboard in the bathroom. On it, there are pictures of pee and poop in the potty (ok pictures of potties and then I colored some brown and yellow... I wanted it to be real but not TOO real, lol), pictures of wet and dirty diapers being put into the pail, a picture of Lydia "telling" me and hubby that she needs to go potty, and a picture of a dry diaper. She was with me while I was making it, and I talked it up, but it still took a few days or so for her to understand what it was for. But she seemed to like it. Oh and at the very bottom was a picture of her "prize"... some Dora panties.
She is still not catching on that she needs to (eventually) initiate her own trips to the potty. But she does things that get my hopes up, and then does other things that just make me really feel like she WILL be wearing diapers to college. On Sunday, she stayed dry (in a Pull-up) ALL DAY, including a #2 in the afternoon. Granted, I was taking her more often than I would have gone myself (and I initiated all the trips), but still, ALL DAY... including eating out after church and being out late like that (she went early at the restaurant and then not again until we got home). But then today, it was diaper after diaper. She did have one instance where I was in the bathroom, and she was in there too, w/ a wet diaper, so I took the old diaper off while I was sitting down and she was standing next to me. Then while her diaper was off and I finished up my business, she sat down UNPROMPTED on her little potty and went #1. Then she thought about it and said she had to go #2, and a few minutes later, she did that as well... also in her potty. We celebrated and got stickers and I started to put a diaper back on her (trying to save the $$$ Pull-ups for church) but she wanted a Pull-up. I told her that she needed to go to the potty on her own and if she peed or pooped in it, then she'd be getting a diaper. Not even FIVE minutes later... she did #2... IN the Pull-up. Yay. Then this evening right before bed, another #2, in her diaper. :( And it was one that was really hard to clean up, too.
So that is where we are with that. I don't want to close on that unhappy note, so I'll share a couple of recent pictures of Benjamin, since it's been a while since I shared.
Monday, December 28, 2009
stuck in the car for twenty-three hours
It should have just been a 6.5 trip under normal conditions. But the weather + abandoned cars + stuck cars + panicky drivers = a 23-hour long trip instead. With a newborn and a toddler.
It started out somewhat normally on Christmas Eve. Tim had to work that day so we were going to go up to Amarillo (from Dallas) that night, and get to my parents' house sometime shortly after midnight. The very first leg of the trip was very slow, before we even got out of Dallas, but it was because of an accident. After we passed the accident, the traffic picked up a little in speed. It was still snowing at this time (about 7:00 p.m.), but very lightly, and visibility was good.
We continued on our path, going up through Denton to Decatur. Traffic continued plugging along slowly, moving down to one lane b/c of how the weather was. The roads were snowy and icy, but nothing completely undrivable. We had just over half a tank of gas left when we reached Decatur, and decided to go ahead and fill up at that time. We also bought a 16-oz coffee. The cup would come in handy later.
Not even two or three miles up from that gas station, traffic came to an absolute standstill. No movement whatsoever. And it stayed like that for a couple of hours. We literally moved fewer than 20 yards in 2 hours. I tried to sleep a little but it's hard to sleep in a car, especially when you can't move the seat down b/c of passengers in the back. Later on, Tim tried to sleep some as well.
There was a hill shortly up the road, and a DPS worker was letting the cars go by one at a time and saying "drive on that spot on the hill so you can get traction and don't slide back down." He also said that we should be able to make it all the way to Wichita Falls (normally about 70 minutes of traveling time) but that the roads would be like this the whole way (one lane, icy, etc.). We were moving again. The snow had completely stopped by now and visibility was as good as it could be, for being in the middle of the night.
We did NOT make it to Wichita Falls before we were stopped again. This time, we were on a slight curve in the road, and we could see the 50+ cars each in front of and behind us, in the same predicament. We would have loved to pull off the road and go into a hotel somewhere and wait it out, but there was a median with 8-10" drifts in it on one side, and a big ditch on the other. During this stoppage, someone in a Ford Focus tried to drive in the other lane, and they got stuck shortly in front of us and were going nowhere fast. Tim got out to try to help, and also to help another car that had gotten stuck as well.
The coffee was long since gone, as was the water we had brought, and I was getting thirsty. Tim took the empty coffee cup and stepped off the road into some untouched snow and filled it up for me, so it could melt and I could eat it. I couldn't wait for it to melt, though, and so I ate little bits of ice. It helped some, but what I really needed was ounces of water, not mere teaspoons.
We watched the sun rise at one of the stuck spots, and Benjamin finally woke up to eat. I had Tim get out and pass him to me in the front seat, and I fed him while sitting in the car in the line of non-moving traffic. And I changed his diaper on my lap a few times. All of them were #2 diapers. If the traffic were moving at all, even inches at a time, I would not have fed him in the front seat like that. We were completely stopped for all 4-5 of his feeds that he needed while in the line.
We were nearing half a tank of gas again, and pulled off to a 7-11 station. They had no gas at the time, only diesel. It was about 10:00 a.m. at this time. The road briefly had two drivable lanes, and there was someone behind and to the left of us who got Tim's attention right after he buckled Benjamin back up after a feed. It was a family and the mama asked if I had any water, and told Tim that if I'm breastfeeding then I need some water, and she gave him a bottle for me. :)
The next gas station we came to was one at Iowa Park (still normally 30 minutes before Wichita Falls), and this one DID have gas, and a long line for the bathroom, and food. I let Tim run in to the bathroom first and then I took Lydia out so she could stretch her legs. Except for a brief diaper change earlier, she hadn't been out of her car seat at all. Poor thing was such a trooper though. She did not want to walk on the ice, though, and at the very slightest slip, she started crying and needed me to carry her. So I went to the bathroom and got some food and more water while Tim was pumping gas. I came back outside to find several people helping him to get up the icy hill to leave the station. Part of the problem was the ice, definitely, but I think another part of the problem was that the parking brake was still on. We did get out of that station with little ado and were on our way again. This was about 1:15 p.m. We had now been on the road for 19 hours.
Once inside Wichita Falls, the traffic moved along w/ one lane. There were a ton of abandoned vehicles still on the road that we had to weave around. And you know those big signs in large cities that will say what the traffic conditions are, like for rush hours? There was one of those signs in Wichita Falls, and it said that US-287 (the road we were on and needed to stay on) was closed west of the city. We were hoping that it was just an old message and we would be able to continue moving. And we did, slowly. We were averaging about 5 to 10 MPH during this time.
We passed some "encouraging" road signs that said things like "Amarillo... 231 miles." At our current speed, that meant it would take us 23 to 46 hours to get there, lol. And outside of Wichita Falls, we did have one final hour or so of standstill before we were able to get going again. But sometime between Wichita Falls and Vernon, we saw spots of real pavement. The slush got less and less, and we were able to finish the trip in the usual amount of time, and even go the normal speed limit. We finally reached my parents' house at 5:15 p.m., a full 23 hours after we had started out.
I am glad we were able to spend some time with them, but I just wish it had been a little more time. Tim did say that I could probably take a longer trip up there in the spring, though.
It started out somewhat normally on Christmas Eve. Tim had to work that day so we were going to go up to Amarillo (from Dallas) that night, and get to my parents' house sometime shortly after midnight. The very first leg of the trip was very slow, before we even got out of Dallas, but it was because of an accident. After we passed the accident, the traffic picked up a little in speed. It was still snowing at this time (about 7:00 p.m.), but very lightly, and visibility was good.
We continued on our path, going up through Denton to Decatur. Traffic continued plugging along slowly, moving down to one lane b/c of how the weather was. The roads were snowy and icy, but nothing completely undrivable. We had just over half a tank of gas left when we reached Decatur, and decided to go ahead and fill up at that time. We also bought a 16-oz coffee. The cup would come in handy later.
Not even two or three miles up from that gas station, traffic came to an absolute standstill. No movement whatsoever. And it stayed like that for a couple of hours. We literally moved fewer than 20 yards in 2 hours. I tried to sleep a little but it's hard to sleep in a car, especially when you can't move the seat down b/c of passengers in the back. Later on, Tim tried to sleep some as well.
There was a hill shortly up the road, and a DPS worker was letting the cars go by one at a time and saying "drive on that spot on the hill so you can get traction and don't slide back down." He also said that we should be able to make it all the way to Wichita Falls (normally about 70 minutes of traveling time) but that the roads would be like this the whole way (one lane, icy, etc.). We were moving again. The snow had completely stopped by now and visibility was as good as it could be, for being in the middle of the night.
We did NOT make it to Wichita Falls before we were stopped again. This time, we were on a slight curve in the road, and we could see the 50+ cars each in front of and behind us, in the same predicament. We would have loved to pull off the road and go into a hotel somewhere and wait it out, but there was a median with 8-10" drifts in it on one side, and a big ditch on the other. During this stoppage, someone in a Ford Focus tried to drive in the other lane, and they got stuck shortly in front of us and were going nowhere fast. Tim got out to try to help, and also to help another car that had gotten stuck as well.
The coffee was long since gone, as was the water we had brought, and I was getting thirsty. Tim took the empty coffee cup and stepped off the road into some untouched snow and filled it up for me, so it could melt and I could eat it. I couldn't wait for it to melt, though, and so I ate little bits of ice. It helped some, but what I really needed was ounces of water, not mere teaspoons.
We watched the sun rise at one of the stuck spots, and Benjamin finally woke up to eat. I had Tim get out and pass him to me in the front seat, and I fed him while sitting in the car in the line of non-moving traffic. And I changed his diaper on my lap a few times. All of them were #2 diapers. If the traffic were moving at all, even inches at a time, I would not have fed him in the front seat like that. We were completely stopped for all 4-5 of his feeds that he needed while in the line.
We were nearing half a tank of gas again, and pulled off to a 7-11 station. They had no gas at the time, only diesel. It was about 10:00 a.m. at this time. The road briefly had two drivable lanes, and there was someone behind and to the left of us who got Tim's attention right after he buckled Benjamin back up after a feed. It was a family and the mama asked if I had any water, and told Tim that if I'm breastfeeding then I need some water, and she gave him a bottle for me. :)
The next gas station we came to was one at Iowa Park (still normally 30 minutes before Wichita Falls), and this one DID have gas, and a long line for the bathroom, and food. I let Tim run in to the bathroom first and then I took Lydia out so she could stretch her legs. Except for a brief diaper change earlier, she hadn't been out of her car seat at all. Poor thing was such a trooper though. She did not want to walk on the ice, though, and at the very slightest slip, she started crying and needed me to carry her. So I went to the bathroom and got some food and more water while Tim was pumping gas. I came back outside to find several people helping him to get up the icy hill to leave the station. Part of the problem was the ice, definitely, but I think another part of the problem was that the parking brake was still on. We did get out of that station with little ado and were on our way again. This was about 1:15 p.m. We had now been on the road for 19 hours.
Once inside Wichita Falls, the traffic moved along w/ one lane. There were a ton of abandoned vehicles still on the road that we had to weave around. And you know those big signs in large cities that will say what the traffic conditions are, like for rush hours? There was one of those signs in Wichita Falls, and it said that US-287 (the road we were on and needed to stay on) was closed west of the city. We were hoping that it was just an old message and we would be able to continue moving. And we did, slowly. We were averaging about 5 to 10 MPH during this time.
We passed some "encouraging" road signs that said things like "Amarillo... 231 miles." At our current speed, that meant it would take us 23 to 46 hours to get there, lol. And outside of Wichita Falls, we did have one final hour or so of standstill before we were able to get going again. But sometime between Wichita Falls and Vernon, we saw spots of real pavement. The slush got less and less, and we were able to finish the trip in the usual amount of time, and even go the normal speed limit. We finally reached my parents' house at 5:15 p.m., a full 23 hours after we had started out.
I am glad we were able to spend some time with them, but I just wish it had been a little more time. Tim did say that I could probably take a longer trip up there in the spring, though.
Friday, December 11, 2009
when being abnormal is a bad thing
There were some things in my past that I could classify as abuse. These things caused me to build a little wall. I thought I healed and I thought I tore down the wall, but maybe I didn't. Sometimes being abnormal is OK (like we as Christians are a peculiar people) but sometimes it's not OK. I think that my wall is still there. Sometimes I just feel... not "sad" really, but just emotionless in general, almost like I'm afraid or unable to feel anything very deeply. Like with the birth of my children... I didn't feel a huge adrenaline rush with either one of them. I didn't have thoughts of "OH it's my BABY and you're here and I'm so excited to meet you!" The thoughts were more like "oh, hi baby. You came out. Nice to meet you." When I watch the video of my son's birth, it's evident to me the lack of strong emotions.
Now don't get me wrong, I DO love my kids. But more often than not, it's more of a mental thing than an emotional thing. It's like I am taking care of them and stuff and just going through the motions that I mentally know that I'm "supposed" to, and that's the main driver.
I wouldn't be so concerned, except that from the time I was a child, being a mom was ALL I wanted to do. That was it. I didn't want to have a career when I grew up. Being a mom WAS the career I wanted. Then years later now that I AM a mom, I'm like "this is it? This is all there is?" The excitement and happiness and love that I thought when I was younger that I'd have, just isn't there w/ the expected intensity.
And it's not like I CAN'T feel things intensely. I have before. But just not in the recent past, or even in the short-term past. And I don't know if it's just because I'm getting older or if I really am NOT normal this way, b/c of the wall that I've built. I can't break down this wall myself. But it needs to go. The people around me are suffering and they deserve better. Somewhere on the mess of the dining room/craft table is the book outlining the benefits that Tim gets at his job, and I am going to see if there is some sort of counseling hotline there first. Maybe they can either reassure me or maybe they can refer me for further assistance.
But enough about that. In other news, potty training is actually moving FORWARD with Lydia! Sometime while we were out of town at Thanksgiving, she started being able to reliably go #1 whenever we put her on the potty. And sometimes she could even do #2, too. She totally doesn't feel the urge to go on her OWN yet, and doesn't care or notice if her diaper is wet (like if she's playing or whatever), so I can see this still being a several-months-long process, but I am pleased with some progress, finally.
Now don't get me wrong, I DO love my kids. But more often than not, it's more of a mental thing than an emotional thing. It's like I am taking care of them and stuff and just going through the motions that I mentally know that I'm "supposed" to, and that's the main driver.
I wouldn't be so concerned, except that from the time I was a child, being a mom was ALL I wanted to do. That was it. I didn't want to have a career when I grew up. Being a mom WAS the career I wanted. Then years later now that I AM a mom, I'm like "this is it? This is all there is?" The excitement and happiness and love that I thought when I was younger that I'd have, just isn't there w/ the expected intensity.
And it's not like I CAN'T feel things intensely. I have before. But just not in the recent past, or even in the short-term past. And I don't know if it's just because I'm getting older or if I really am NOT normal this way, b/c of the wall that I've built. I can't break down this wall myself. But it needs to go. The people around me are suffering and they deserve better. Somewhere on the mess of the dining room/craft table is the book outlining the benefits that Tim gets at his job, and I am going to see if there is some sort of counseling hotline there first. Maybe they can either reassure me or maybe they can refer me for further assistance.
But enough about that. In other news, potty training is actually moving FORWARD with Lydia! Sometime while we were out of town at Thanksgiving, she started being able to reliably go #1 whenever we put her on the potty. And sometimes she could even do #2, too. She totally doesn't feel the urge to go on her OWN yet, and doesn't care or notice if her diaper is wet (like if she's playing or whatever), so I can see this still being a several-months-long process, but I am pleased with some progress, finally.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
"potty training" my son
Yes, my son, and no, I'm not talking about a future event. I hope nobody thinks I've gone completely off my rocker after reading this blog entry, lol. Anyway, it's not really potty training, but elimination communication. There are any number of sites and books out there that go into more detail on it, but the gist of it is that newborns and infants give off signals when they're about to go to the bathroom. Parents can pick up on these signals, even part time, and an infant can start to hold it until being held over the toilet or small potty bowl. Then the parent can start giving "cue sounds" to help the infant make an association between the sound and the going.
Anyway I had heard about this a long time ago, probably when I was pregnant with Lydia or even before that. I tried it with her, but didn't really start until she was 15 months or so, but that was too late already. If a baby's signals aren't being read by the parent, then the baby will eventually stop giving them as they continually "learn" to use their diaper instead. Then when the baby is a few years old, they have to "unlearn" how to use the diaper and how TO use the potty.
So far, I've been pretty much a failure at trying to potty train Lydia. I was also a failure when I tried to potty train our cats, back when we had them. (Don't laugh too hard, there's actually an entire Yahoo group dedicated to helping people learn how to toilet train their cats... TOILET train, not litter box train.) So when I wondered if I could do elimination communication (or EC for short) with Benjamin, I went into the adventure stresslessly, without any expectations. In fact, I was more thinking that I'd fail rather than have any success at it, since I can't seem to get Lydia potty trained properly. But I was pleased and surprised at the early results so far.
It sort of started subconsciously a few weeks ago, because I noticed that when he was nursing, he'd sometimes pop on and off for a few minutes, then do a #2, then be able to relax and nurse. So that was one clear signal that he gave. Another more subtle one is sometimes he will just seem to be staring off into space, and then a #2 comes out of nowhere. But yesterday, I started trying to take him to the potty. I had several "catches" (what EC-ers call it when the #1 and/or #2 goes into the potty) yesterday, including one after Tim got home from work late that night. That catch was about 10 seconds after Tim walked past the bathroom, and he was amused and curious as to why I was holding our baby over the toilet. Then today, I've had more #2 catches in the toilet than have been in the diaper. One of them was after he'd been napping for only about an hour. I heard him stirring in the other room and went to get him, undressed him, and found his diaper was dry and clean. I held him over the toilet, and within less than 2 minutes, the #2 came and he was much relieved. Once he was more comfortable, he nursed back to sleep and I expect the rest of his nap to last about 2.5 hours or so.
In other news, I'm looking forward to going out of town to see my family next week for the holiday. Lydia is finally getting her 2-year molars... all 4 of them at once. Tim is really loving his new job, but is in the middle of working 10 straight days, including Sunday, so that he will be off for Thursday and Friday and can come with me out of town (and that schedule was a company-wide thing rather than his choice to work those particular days).
Anyway I had heard about this a long time ago, probably when I was pregnant with Lydia or even before that. I tried it with her, but didn't really start until she was 15 months or so, but that was too late already. If a baby's signals aren't being read by the parent, then the baby will eventually stop giving them as they continually "learn" to use their diaper instead. Then when the baby is a few years old, they have to "unlearn" how to use the diaper and how TO use the potty.
So far, I've been pretty much a failure at trying to potty train Lydia. I was also a failure when I tried to potty train our cats, back when we had them. (Don't laugh too hard, there's actually an entire Yahoo group dedicated to helping people learn how to toilet train their cats... TOILET train, not litter box train.) So when I wondered if I could do elimination communication (or EC for short) with Benjamin, I went into the adventure stresslessly, without any expectations. In fact, I was more thinking that I'd fail rather than have any success at it, since I can't seem to get Lydia potty trained properly. But I was pleased and surprised at the early results so far.
It sort of started subconsciously a few weeks ago, because I noticed that when he was nursing, he'd sometimes pop on and off for a few minutes, then do a #2, then be able to relax and nurse. So that was one clear signal that he gave. Another more subtle one is sometimes he will just seem to be staring off into space, and then a #2 comes out of nowhere. But yesterday, I started trying to take him to the potty. I had several "catches" (what EC-ers call it when the #1 and/or #2 goes into the potty) yesterday, including one after Tim got home from work late that night. That catch was about 10 seconds after Tim walked past the bathroom, and he was amused and curious as to why I was holding our baby over the toilet. Then today, I've had more #2 catches in the toilet than have been in the diaper. One of them was after he'd been napping for only about an hour. I heard him stirring in the other room and went to get him, undressed him, and found his diaper was dry and clean. I held him over the toilet, and within less than 2 minutes, the #2 came and he was much relieved. Once he was more comfortable, he nursed back to sleep and I expect the rest of his nap to last about 2.5 hours or so.
In other news, I'm looking forward to going out of town to see my family next week for the holiday. Lydia is finally getting her 2-year molars... all 4 of them at once. Tim is really loving his new job, but is in the middle of working 10 straight days, including Sunday, so that he will be off for Thursday and Friday and can come with me out of town (and that schedule was a company-wide thing rather than his choice to work those particular days).
Thursday, November 12, 2009
adjusting slowly but surely
I'm not back to 100% yet, but getting there slowly. Some days I think that I can handle being a mom of two after all. But there are still those hours here and there where I still just wonder what I got myself into and lament the fact that it's too late to change my mind about being a parent even of one child, never mind two. I'm still sleep-deprived although I have started taking a short nap if both of them happen to be napping at the same time. And he is starting to sleep a little more at night, from about 11-6 with one brief waking, so that seems to help a little, too. But right now with him it's just eat, diaper, cry, diaper, eat, eat, cry, diaper, eat, cry, diaper, cry, sleep, sleep, diaper, eat, cry, sleep, diaper. And some of that crying is from me and not from Benjamin, lol.
Lydia continues to be a challenge and a joy at the same time. She continues to randomly get my hopes up for potty training. Like this evening in her bath, she randomly said that she went in the tub, and that she wanted out. I asked her if she wanted to go in her potty and get new bathwater and she said yes, and she went in her potty right away. But all day long, she never mentioned or noticed her diaper, and also said that there was no #2 in a particular diaper when I asked her, but really there was.
Benjamin is still "suffering" from some newborn acne. (It's just visually unappealing, but doesn't seem to bother him at all.) I am ready for it to go away. It had some improvement earlier this month but hasn't made any additional improvement since then, that I can tell. Other than that, though, he's doing well, growing and gaining. On Saturday he was 10 lbs even and 23.5" long. I had that one "awake" smile when he was about 3 weeks old but am still waiting for any more. In the meantime, though, I sure do love the cooing. I don't remember Lydia starting her cooing this early, but Benjamin's been doing it nearly since birth, it seems. Here's a short clip where he has a sound in the beginning and then a few more near the end.
Lydia continues to be a challenge and a joy at the same time. She continues to randomly get my hopes up for potty training. Like this evening in her bath, she randomly said that she went in the tub, and that she wanted out. I asked her if she wanted to go in her potty and get new bathwater and she said yes, and she went in her potty right away. But all day long, she never mentioned or noticed her diaper, and also said that there was no #2 in a particular diaper when I asked her, but really there was.
Benjamin is still "suffering" from some newborn acne. (It's just visually unappealing, but doesn't seem to bother him at all.) I am ready for it to go away. It had some improvement earlier this month but hasn't made any additional improvement since then, that I can tell. Other than that, though, he's doing well, growing and gaining. On Saturday he was 10 lbs even and 23.5" long. I had that one "awake" smile when he was about 3 weeks old but am still waiting for any more. In the meantime, though, I sure do love the cooing. I don't remember Lydia starting her cooing this early, but Benjamin's been doing it nearly since birth, it seems. Here's a short clip where he has a sound in the beginning and then a few more near the end.
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